We have been having a HARD time with our evening routine, ever since I went to work 6 months ago. Gavin was used to me being home 24/7, and having me & Daddy home for dinner was a guarantee. Now that I work the 2nd shift and Sean works overnights, Gavin and his two siblings are left with an AMAZING family member on nights that he and I both have to work.
While Gavin LOVES when she comes, the time period between when he gets off the bus and when she arrives has become a 4 hour time slot full of panic. He has manifested this panic, into a fixation on dinner. (LOL) Now, while this may sound funny to some of you....I assure you it isn't. It began as a slight nuisance, and over the course of 3 weeks, became such a repetitive subject matter that Sean and I were at a snapping point.
The conversation would go something like this:
"Colie....What's for dinner tonight?"---- Gavin
"Daddy is going to make_______ tonight." ----Me
"oh, ok."---- Gavin
(time elapse 3 minutes)
"Colie...are you sure that's what he is making"--- Gavin
"Yes Honey....*kiss&hug* Love you. I have to go to work. I will kiss your forehead while you're sleeping when I get home, and I will see you in the morning. I love you from here......."----Me
"....To the Moon. See you in the morning!"---Gavin
(Time Elapse 35 minutes....Once I've been at work for approx 20 minutes)
*phone rings*
"Help Me. He won't stop. He has asked::: When dinner is, what I'm making, If I'm SURE that's what I'm making, if we have all the stuff I need to make it, If I'll still be here for dinner, If that's what Holden is having for dinner, what is Nola having for dinner, am I leaving after I have dinner......(REPEAT x10) I'm going CrAzY!"----Sean
Now, rather than us telling Gavin that he has been told what is for dinner and that if he asks again he will be punished....or that we will only answer the question a certain number of times.....or that he isn't allowed to ask about dinner....or any other number of ridiculous things that would only result in an INCREASE his anxiety, we came up with a better plan :0)
We have implemented a daily menu, starting today. We sat down with Gavin, and explained that when he comes home from school the menu will be listed. There will be no changes to the menu once it is posted, and that Daddy, Holden & Nola will always be home for supper with him.
We will see if this alleviates some of his panic he has associated with dinner time, in Sean and I working these late hours. I'm hoping that he will feel as though he has more control over the situation and I have also asked him to help me come up with the menu ever Sunday for the rest of the week (He was tickled PINK at being involved in such a 'grown-up' task like planning meals for his family!) :0)
I hate that we have put him into a situation where he feels uncomfortable. And part of me feels SO SO guilty. I would love to go home tomorrow and tell Gavin that I am going to be a Stay-At-Home-Mama again. But, I love my job, and let's get real....I didn't win the lotto. I have three kids and I am 24 years old. I NEED to work! (LOL)
So, until I win the lotto....here's to being innovative and trying to help my baby over these hurdles in which he faces. I hope I always have an open mind, and that I have the ability to look OUTSIDE the box, and see through the 'silliness' that others may be blinded by, and see the REAL issue at hand. I hope I can always 'read' him, and be able to find some sort of solution. Even if it ends up being a flop, I will ALWAYS try anything and everything to help him on his journey, and in doing so I hope that he is blessed with having creativity in resolving his own problems in his future.
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